Christmas shopping

Today I decided to go down the mountain and look for some last minute things for Heather. The watch is nice but she knows about it and I wanted her to have some surprises to open up. I was looking for a new CB antennae for the green car so I had to stop off at a parts place. They didn't have the antennae I wanted so I got on with the task of shopping for more intriguing female oddities. I'm waiting behind this guy to turn right on Academy (think Manchester Road for you STL peeps.....busy.....6 lanes). The guy in front of me is looking at God knows what inside his car. He misses several chances to go and then there's about a 100 yard clearing. I wait. The window is closing fast and there's a line a mile long coming. I give the guy a small toot from my horn. He looks all the way back at me and then gives me the finger then slowly starts to inch out. Completely uncalled for. I could see if I laid on the horn but....a simple toot? So as we're getting up to speed, I maneuver to pass him on the left and he's staring me down. I offer up a friendly wave to say "no harm" and go on about my business. A mile later (it took some time to get her up to speed) this guy comes flying by me on the right and swerves in front of me and then slams on his brakes and gives me the finger again. After I got the Subie off it's nose, I downshifted (thinking this guy's dangerous) and hit it. I ended up moving to the left to get around him again and, as I'm next to him, he swerves left and almost takes out the right fender/front door. Cooler heads prevailed and I got around him and scooted on down the road. I probably should have stayed behind the guy but I knew the hoopty wouldn't keep up and I could just get out of dodge. Well...several miles later, here he comes again and, this time, I'm about to stop at a light and I'm boxed in. He slides up next to me and leans over to open his door and I roll down the window. He asks me (in much colorful language) if I have a problem. I mention I didn't until he tried to hit me. He calls me more names (none of which are Chris) and I tell him I was merely letting him know there was a gap in traffic so we could both get going. More colorful language ensues and he tells me that he was stopped for a reason and that he was, "Tryin' to handle mines." He says his phone was about to die and that he was scrambling for the charger. I couldn't help but laugh when I apologized for not being more understanding so that he could fix shit up to yak non-stop on his celly while driving. Then I told him it was quite obvious that he had the driving part down so I could certainly understand adding additional challenges. He didn't like this and called me more non-festiv names. Then I grabbed my cell phone and told him it was fully charged and asked if we should contact the Springs PD and see if they could help us sort things out. Then things were all cool in school. Funny thing was that he was in a left turn lane and I was in a lane to go straight. The light turned green and the driver in front of him wasn't paying attention and he lays on the horn and starts in with the fingers. The good news was that I didn't spill any of my coffee and, after a few more stops, I was able to find Heather some goods.

Tis the season.