Thursday, November 11, 2010

People

In one episode of Seinfeld, this subject comes up and I remember Jerry says, "I hate people....they're the WORST."

Those that know me will attest to the fact that I have some things I'm continually working on. One of the things involves people, in general. Today I had to go to a training for work that was down in Pueblo. It was actually at a nice hotel but that's beside the point. I wasn't really looking forward to going because I know I am a bit anti-social. We needed to bring our laptops to the training so I got there early to scout out locations for electrical outlets. I found one in a great location near the front of the conference room but off to the side. My seat at the table was one where my power chord would reach the outlet and I wouldn't have to crane my neck too much to see the screen or presenter. The hotel provided good coffee. I was set.

I'll be damned if within 10 minutes of me setting up camp a group of ladies approached me and asked if they could take the rest of the seats at the table. Sure. Go ahead. The woman on my right wanted to make small talk and I'm not good at that with most strangers. I find it awkward. Then the woman on my left breaks out a huge hunk of beef jerky only to be followed by a Slim Jim. She was working that beef. Next was a bag of sunflower seeds that a flock of crows couldn't put a dent in if they had all afternoon to work on it. All this was washed down with multiple glasses of fluids and...yes...she did chew with her mouth open and after cleansing her pallet, she would go, "Ahhhhhhhhh!" and smack her lips. We won't even go into the amount of picking at her teeth that occurred between sessions. I almost offered her dental floss along with an encouragement to go to the bathroom. Directly across the table from me was a woman who had literally rolled out of bed to arrive at said training. She had greasy hair, and extreme bed head. Now....under most circumstances none of this would bother me but in close quarters it's an ice cube to the man sack. And for the sake of your time I will completely avoid the notion that these are teachers of students involved in special education (students that, perhaps more than most students, need good guidance and adult examples).

Heather says I'd be fine living in a cabin up in the wilderness all by my lonesome. I have issues but at least I know what they are.

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