Situation

My family has serious issues with colon cancer and cancer in general. My father-in-law is currently dealing with his colon cancer. So....Heather and I thought it would be a wise idea for me to get checked out. So.....I am currently preparing for a colonoscopy or as I like to think of it.....a good snaking. Today I can't eat anything that can't be chewed. My lovely wife just enjoyed some delicious looking pizza. I have had a bowl of cereal and a bow of mashed taters today. We went to test drive the van tonight and happened to stop off at Whole Foods. I love Whole Foods but.....not when I can't eat. While I did enter the store with her, I eventually ended up walking out and I sat in the van (back seat mind you) and talked on the phone with my friend Scott. I can drink beer so I'm doing plenty of that tonight. Tomorrow I can only have clear things. Chicken broth. Beef broth. Water. Zema was/is clear right? Monday morning will be the second time in my life that I have been put under with the uh........anasthetic. The first time was last summer when my wisdom teeth were yanked. I cried like a school girl before I went to la la land. Very freaky. I'm not lookin' forward to it. What's worse....someone's gonna shove (cuz there's probably no easin' it in there when I'm knocked out) a camera in me and take a look at my damn tonsils. Wonder if they'll find my damn dignity in there???? What a way to start off the summer.

I'm so hungry. My lovely wife ate some delicious looking food tonight. I actually licked her plate while she was watching tv. I don't know how tomorrow is going to go. It's not gonna be good.