Dental Snafu

Go figure. I had another dental snafu. I get to my appoint at 1 at my doctors second office. Holy crap was it nice. The bathroom was nothing shy of exquisite. I left my phone in the waiting room so I don't have a pic of the joint but I'll get one along with the rest of the office. Let me just talk about the toilet for a second. OK...since it IS a public RR, I don't touch the vital equipment at all. I mean...I touch mine but not the fixtures. So I do my normal move where I lift the lid with the side of my shoe. Nothing new there. I do my thang. I'm not a redneck...I DO put the lid back down out of respect for the ladies. This is when things got interesting. Sometimes the lid slips off the side of the shoe during "the move" and it ends up slamming down. I felt some sort of odd resistance. After a few seconds of standing on one foot while trying to avoid the dreaded slam, I realized that the lid had some sort of spring assistance in it. Super hot. So then I lift it back up and go to let it slam. No worries. Just a gradual closure. I wanted to do it again but I thought THAT might be weird. So back to the waiting room.

My name is called and we go through all the necessary banter but avoid the fact that I am angry as hell that I gotta be here at all despite the toilet situation. Finally I'm like, "Dude...I got Dark Side of the Moon cued up over here can we just get to the gas?" Then it comes. I get the mask on and the nice lady starts in with the warnings and I'm thinking, "Look....just put it on full flow and beat it already." Five minutes later and David Gilmour still sounds well......the same. What the hell is going on? Then I start to panic. They spent so much money on the bathroom and the slate floors and now they're not gonna give me the good shit. Sub-par effin gas. She fiddles with the machine to appease me and sucking in air like a finely tuned supercharger. Nothing!! No glorious state of intoxication. I know somethings wrong b/c I'm not thinking of any sexual jokes or the other stuff that made me giggle like a school girl the last time. She asks if I'm feeling the effects of the gas yet and I say, "Hell no! Turn that shit up!" Then she tells me that it's on the highest setting. Ruh roh. I'd have taken a piss in a Johnny on the Spot if it meant I'd get the good stuff. The doctor comes in and it's a different doctor than I had last time which I'm also a bit put off by because he had a perm that was kinda Ron Jeremy-esque. Whatever dude.

So this guy starts in with the introductions. and what not and then tells me he's gonna start with the shots. Whoa there haws. I'm not in the zone yet. First we gotta get this gas things sorted. So he comes at me with the needle and the guy is literally forcing my mouth open and then I feel the first ones go in and they hurt like hell. I remember kicking the chair and almost ripping the handles off. 6 shots later and he says he'll be back. He comes back and does some tests to see how things are going and I almost hit him and the ceiling when I still feel things. More shots. We do this dance for the next half hour.

At one point I have the liquid drug they inject into your mouth running down my cheek b/c I guess my mouth wont hold any more. This guys changing cartridges like a damn sniper. Now I'm pissed off because it still hurts just as bad as the first. In the end this guy gives up and tells me that he's tried 4 different drug types, given me about 20 shots and that a full grown elephant would now be down for the count. He can't do the root canal. I still feel everything. I flinched just as bad on the last shot as the first.

So...we have to re-schedule so that they can put me under with an IV sedation and do their thing. Root canals are spendy enough. This extra sedation is gonna cost me about 600 clams and I'm not happy about that. When they told me this I asked if they could just do it anyway and I'd just squeeze really hard or go get a fifth of Jack Daniels. They weren't having it.

The good news for you all is that you're gonna get to see that bathroom and the toilet seat. I may even go so far as to shoot a video of the lid. I know.....who loves ya? Bad news is I gotta wait a bit over a week to get this done and I think the infection is really messing with me. I can't eat, sleep sometimes, and riding is just ridiculously hard.